Making the reader care

Sometimes I read stories that seem somehow flat - good idea, good writing but flat - I do not feel like I am there, I do not feel moved by what is happening, I do not care. The solution is summed up by writer Blair Hurley, who said: “When asked what makes our favourite books our favourite books, sometimes we're hard pressed to find an answer. Often it's just a feeling that makes the book special -- a mood that is splendidly cultivated throughout the story and succeeds in immersing us in the world. To improve the impact and feeling of your stories, writers should always consider working on mood and consistency.”
I believe that sense of place is important in creating mood. I know you have to avoid cliche but if you want scariness, there’s nothing wrong with an old house, or empty building at night. I know that making a pleasant suburban house scary can be effective as well, but using an appropriate place can be an effective shortcut. For sadness, there’s nothing wrong with a graveyard or a funeral home, for uneasiness a lonely street at night, for instance. For happiness, think of a happy place, make the sun shine. You can always make something nightmarish happen there but you have created a mood in your reader.
Given that sense of place is crucial for mood, there is a fine balance to consider here; too much description slows a story, too little does not give the reader the chance to feel they are in the place with the characters. It is crucial that if you write about a place that the reader can see it.
You have choices to achieve that: do you write rich and vivid prose to paint a word picture or do you keep it minimalist - describe a tree in a park and we all see a different tree and a different park? Perhaps we only need to say it is a tree in a park? Some would argue that. I always think, however, that you hone in on two or three main aspects of a place.
An example, I live in a narrow street of three-storey town houses. It always feels like a canyon to me and when asked to describe it to people I always say it’s a canyon which is in shadow even when the sun shines. Not bothered about the number of houses, exactly what they look like, I reckon those two facts will be enough to give them a strong sense of what our street is like.
When selecting those things on which to hone in, consider
1 Physical characteristics - what does it look like, any quirks which bring it to life?
2 Use your reader’s senses - what does the place smell, taste, sound like?
3 What does it feel like to be there? I know the narrator needs to be separate but I do think the narrator can give a clue - The hall was old and musty. Musty is the narrator interpreting what the place feels like.
Oh, and remember weather - driving rain creates a different feel to an arid dry heat. If I read a story where the sun is shining and there is a delightful breeze I feel different to a story where the rain is driving against the windowpane and darkness has come early.
Get the place right and the mood flows into the story.


John Dean